Thursday, October 4, 2012

Friendship

Welcome to Unseen today. Today's post is a two-for-one. A very dear friend of mine died this last week. He was Unseen, suffering from chronic illness and depression, and was one of my earliest supporters. Friendship is critical in living unseen, but it is hard to let ourselves be vulnerable. I have included a story about two friends who were priceless, and also a tribute to my friend.


Two of a Kind

Be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God through Christ has forgiven you. Eph. 4:32

            I had two precious little aunts. They were roommates in college and never lived more than a mile apart after that. They used to sing together on the radio in the days of the Stamps Baxter Quartet.  They were as different as chalk and cheese, but they loved each other dearly. Lita owned a variety store for many years and had a passion for Christian education, music and loving people. She never had children so she borrowed everyone else’s. If you were in Dallas and needed a place to stay for the night, the weekend, the summer or the semester, Lita’s house was always open. Mildred was an accountant and just as passionate. She had a glass eye because of an accident. One weekend she and Lita were staying with my grandparents in Amarillo. I was about 7 or 8. I had gone into her bedroom to look for something. I don’t remember what I was looking for, but I remember what I found. THE GLASS EYE! It was sitting in a bowl on the nightstand. I never again went in a room where she was sleeping. 
            When Lita and Mildred were in their 50’s, they decided to help take care of a widower at their church. Mildred thought he would be a great match for Lita and did her best to arrange it. Unfortunately, Lita had been left at the altar when she was 18 and wasn’t interested in being matched again. Despite Mildred’s best efforts, Claude fell in love with her and not Lita. They were married 19 years before he died.
            Too much togetherness brings trouble. Lita and Mildred would come to Austin for Thanksgiving. They often got lost and would come in fussing at each other about whose fault it was. There was one surefire way to stop any argument between them. Someone would say, “Come on. Let’s hear you two sing.” They would put their arms around each other and by the end of the song they had forgotten they were ever mad. How much we can learn from them.
            It is easy for us to get offended. It may be something as simple as arguing over whose fault it is that we got lost. Offenses and fights start with the littlest things.  Unfortunately, if we have not learned the secret of forgiveness, we can let them fester and grow into disagreements that sever relationships. How many arguments do you have with your family members that you later realized were silly? Two that stand out in my family were about leaving twist ties off of the bread bag and cutting butter off at a 45 degree angle instead of straight.  It is unfortunately easier to get offended and upset by someone you love because you care about what they think.  If a stranger took me to task about twist ties I would just think they had gone round the bend.  It is not just individuals that are at risk either. I have known of churches that split because of disagreements over the color of the carpet installed or which songbook was the “right” one.  Knowing how vital fellowship is to our spiritual survival, how sad that it is so often broken over trivial issues.  The enemy uses strife and dissension to his great advantage.  If we are busy fighting each other, we don’t have the energy left to fight him. 
            As we see in Ephesians 4:32, we need to be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another. Jesus says in the Sermon on the Mount, “If you are bringing your gift to the altar and remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift at the altar and go be reconciled.” The book of Proverbs is full of advice on dealing with resentment and strife, including Prov. 17:1, which says, “Better is a crust of bread with contentment than great feasting with strife.”  Since there are so many verses about this issue, God knew that it is a big issue for us. The secret that Lita and Mildred found was the idea that God, through Christ, has forgiven us.  That makes all the difference in being able to forgive each other. Sometimes I can picture Jesus walking up to them in heaven, putting His arms around them and saying, “Come on! Let’s hear you two sing.”

Tribute
My heart is heavy with the loss of one that I held dear,
One that I could laugh with and also shed a tear.
He said I was God's precious child and I shoul never fear
And though he's gone I know that this one thing is clear
 
His voice that had been silent is lifted up in praise
With all the saints and angels, a glorious song they raise
On legs, now strong and whole again he's walking streets of gold
Clear eyes are filled with wonders which here cannot be told.
 
God captured him with stubborn love and saved him by His grace
And now he can at last see his saviour face to face
He would not want my heart to break but rather look ahead
To that day I will join him and my loved ones, alive, not dead.



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